Perfection

I'm not perfect and i will not be perfect until the day I die and go to be with God. But everyday i take a step to become closer to perfect as I can get here on earth. When i say perfect i'm saying spiritually. Perfect in the spirit to me just means joy and happiness. That is the place i am trying to get to. The place where no matter what may happen, no one or nothing can steal my joy. It's definitely a process to get there but God warned me about what i had to go through in order to obtain this happiness that I long for.

I had a dream about 8 years ago that i was getting married and i was in a limo with my wedding party headed to wedding. On the way there we drove through a cemetery and i questioned where we were going. I suddenly noticed a gate about 50ft tall on the other side of the cemetery. Once we get to the gate, it opens and its a beautiful garden with hundreds of people sitting there waiting for me to arrive. It switches and im walking down the aisle only to meet up with my husband whose face i can not see. The moral of that dream was that something in me had to die before i could get to place of happiness i pray for everyday. That garden represented the place that i am trying to get to. My flesh is in the way and i can not obtain that peace until it dies. Satan and God can not dwell in the same place, but God will always win when it comes to me. God granted me that piece of joy 9 months ago but took it away because i didn't know how to maintain it. My flesh keopt getting in the way. Now im on a mission to get it back and all i can do is go to God and depend on him to transform me and make me over so that i can be a good steward over the gift of happiness that he will soon grant me. It may not make sense to some but everything is not meant for everyone to understand. Those who will get it, needed to hear it. I just pray that God gives me strength to endure trials that come my way in the process.....